The Oldest Trick In The Book…
Last night’s date was via SugarDaddie.com.
The Place: Battersea
The Drinks: Wine (for her), Water (for him)
I love a good cheap first date. It really provides the impetus to leave midway through. Key point: if a so-called ‘gentleman’ behaves in a way that is ungentlemanly, one is well within one’s rights to abscond immediately.
The gentleman arrived looking several years older (and balder) than his online portrait. Perhaps he was a reverse Dorian Gray; I’ll certainly never know. After settling into the bar of his choosing and bragging about his Porsche (keys left on the table, in case you didn’t hear it the first time and forgot to drop your knickers), he conveniently “forgets his wallet”.
What does a lady do in this instance? I don’t know, I suppose we’ll have to find one and ask her. This ‘lady’ replied, “I suppose you’ll be having tap water, then.” The conversation went downhill, as one would expect, but surely, if you’ve made such a fuss about your silly million-mph car, you can get back in it, zip back home and get your wallet, no? Well, as I said, I guess you’ll be having tap water.